Friday, January 7, 2011

Ally time

I have a sweet blessing in my life. I call it Ally Time.

I was introduced to the concept last June at the Segullah Writing Retreat in Utah.
One of the presenters talked about creating this unique style of communication with a friend because she needed and wanted it: ally time.

It goes kind of like this. You and a friend discuss the concept and agree that this is something you'd like to try. You probably pick a friend who deeply values the gift of being heard----and the benefit of self-care - - - and who is willing to take a risk with you.

As described by the presenter, you schedule a regular time for your talk. You split the time in half. Each of you gets your turn to talk exactly half (uh huh, using a timer is a good thing) of the time. The listener attends totally - - -but without making comments. Maybe some "oh's" or "wow's" or "uh huh's", but just sending love, not words. (A phenomenon in its self.) The talker can talk about anything, everything, nothing . . . . can unload, shed tears, rant, be repetitive, list her blessings or her annoyances, be brilliant, be boring, be herself . . . . .whatever. She knows she will be heard and loved.

Imagine that.

So for the last several months, I have enjoyed Ally Time once a week.
It's on my calendar.

I look forward to it. I am refreshed by it. I am tickled to have discovered a buddy willing to run this experiment with me.

Yesterday had an "Ally Time" scheduled in.
Ah . . . . . . that felt good!
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  1. Wow, this sounds like a really cool idea. I like this! Now why is it called "ally" ...?

  2. "Ally", as in someone aligned with you (opposite of enemy, perhaps). The woman had a writing ally friend, and a emotional ally friend. Two different people with two different sets of talents.